We never have just one mother.
.
My mother, like me, like all of us,
has experienced countless versions of herself.
.
This is my love letter
to the versions she was and is.
And to the many iterations of me
who needed her.
To the mother who carried and birthed me:
I know you longed for a child with an aching heart.
I know the timing was tangled, the circumstances less than ideal.
I know my delivery was disorienting, overwhelming, and unmooring.
And I am grateful.
.
To the mother who raised me when she was single and struggling:
I know you were surviving more than living.
I know you wanted to be loved and seen, not just needed.
I know there were times when dinner didn’t come easily.
And I am grateful.
.
To the mother who chose a blended family and financial security:
I know you invested in what you believed would serve you, and us, best.
I know there was no manual for becoming stepmother to six.
I know your marriage held both comfort and complexity.
And I am grateful.
.
To the mother who accepted I needed my dad:
I know my leaving left an ache inside.
I know you only ever wanted what was best for me.
I know you gave everything you had to give.
And I am grateful.
.
To the mother who mothered me through college:
I know you were never far, just a phone call or short drive.
I know you were my safety when my heart broke open for the first time.
I know your care, your presence, and comfort made all the difference.
And I am grateful.
.
To the mother who became my daughter’s grandmother:
I know her birth filled you with a joy too big for words.
I know you hoped I’d see you differently now, perhaps even fully.
I know you love her with every corner of your heart.
And I am grateful.
.
To the mother who comforted me when my marriage fell apart:
I know losing your beloved son-in-law brought its own quiet sorrow.
I know you were grieving too, even as you held space for mine.
I know, above all, you just wanted me to find peace.
And I am grateful.
.
To the mother who held me from afar when silence stood between us:
I know our estrangement carved a hollow nothing else could fill.
I know you whispered prayers for me and for us.
I know you kept the light on and held onto hope.
And I am grateful.
.
To the mother who battled breast cancer without me:
I know it was one of the darkest parts of your journey.
I know you downplayed it to me, not wanting to be a burden.
I know the words “cancer-free” felt like the first full breath in a long time.
And I am grateful.
.
To the mother who listened and apologized for the wounds that shaped me:
I know you thought I was fine or had forgotten, and that made it easier not to ask.
I know you carried regret for the things you couldn’t change.
I know it took the woman you became to reckon with the one you had been.
And I am grateful.
.
To the mother who forgave me for the way I punished her:
I know I hurt you too, more than I wanted to admit.
I know you loved me anyway.
I know your forgiveness, like mine, was rooted in love.
And I am grateful.
.
To the mother who kept showing up, even when it was hard:
I know rebuilding what we lost took time and courage.
I know our sensitivities differ, and we don’t speak the same emotional language.
I know we have both been learning how to love and let ourselves be loved.
And I am grateful.
.
To the mother who lost her husband this year:
I know his absence is a quiet weight you carry every day.
I know there are moments you replay, wishing for a different outcome.
I know you chose the best bonus dad for me.
And I am grateful.
.
To the mother I have today:
I know you are only human.
I know you’re doing your best, one day at a time.
I know you.
I see you.
I forgive you.
I love you.
And I am grateful.
.
To the mother I hope to have tomorrow:
I know we’re creating something real and magical.
I know there’s more laughter to share, more stories to write and tell, more time to spend together.
I know choosing you now
is one of the best decisions I’ve ever made.
I know I will have no regrets.
And I am grateful.
You were never just one mother.
You were many.
And I was never just one daughter.
I was many, too.
Together,
we found our way forward.
And through it all,
I had you.
.
And I am grateful.
.
Happy Mother’s Day
Linzi
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